(on the phone)*On a bed I don't know what to do! Seriously nobody understands! No matter how much they want to they just criticize me and if they knew what was really going on instead of just assuming that what was heard and passed around was true and if they knew why I was the way I was they still wouldn't get it…NO! You don't get it either! Don't sit here and try to talk me out of this because I've been talked to I know the consequences and I know the aftermath. Nothing you can say can make me change…nothing anyone says can make me change how I feel! (Throw the phone)
Ugh nobody gets it. (Kneel down in center stage) *Dear God, I hope u can talk for a little bit, you're the only one who will sit here and listen and not talk back in any negative way. You see when you have the problem I do you don't care what people say about you, you still feel the way you have your mind set to. I don't know how much longer I can take this though. If anyone at school knew about this for sure…instead of just assuming that every time I run to the bathroom after a meal is to barf, they'd think I was stupid. But you know what! I don't think I'm dumb at all. I know this is wrong. I know this is bad for you. But honestly, anything is better than being fat. Anything is better than thinking you're fat! Even though those trying to help me say the difference doesn't show on the outside, the difference shows inside of me. I can't help but feel…guilty when I eat & keep it down. I see those models! They are 5'8", wear a size 0, and weigh no more than 120! My friends, my best friends, are both skinny.
*My friends say I'm not fat. They think I'm crazy. Yet on spring break…Hay told me my hips were huge! She covered it up by saying it's a good thing…ha not really. All I want is to have the perfect body, the body guys want. Bulimia has become my obsession. A…


I'm Sandulf

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